Dadvice Weekly #35 / Prenatal Dad
Dadvice Weekly - #35
Finding out you’re going to be a dad is one of those moments you never forget. It’s exciting, it can be a little overwhelming if you think on it too long, and if you’re honest, you have no idea what comes next.
Here is a roadmap I wish I had for the key moments leading up to delivery. From my perspective, this is how to use your time well.
Here are seven things I’d strongly recommend focusing on before your baby arrives. -SW
Prepare the nursery
Remember when you were wedding planning and your wife knew exactly what she wanted because she had been thinking about it her whole life? Preparing the nursery feels like the sequel to that story.
My advice is simple. Let her lead and support where needed.
Your role will likely look like:
Hanging shelves
Building the crib
Saying yes to buying new items
One of the most helpful things you can do is help discern what goes on the registry versus what you go ahead and buy yourselves. That kind of tangible help goes a long way.
Understand nesting and support it well
At some point, your wife is going to shift into nesting mode.
For us, this meant cleaning everything. The oven, vents, blinds, baseboards, grout, cabinets. Literally everything.
Lean into it. Do not question it or resist it. You will enjoy the cleanliness afterward too.
My tangible advice:
Pick a date to do the deep clean. Find a weekend where the sports calendar is light and your schedule is open. Nothing is worse than cleaning instead of watching The Masters or March Madness.
Make a list of everything that needs to be done so you can track progress.
There is a YouTube video for how to clean anything efficiently. Watch one, learn the right methods, and get the right supplies. A trip to Home Depot makes the whole process easier.
When you finish, go out for a great meal. We saved a few hundred dollars doing it ourselves and celebrated with something we really enjoyed.
Engage in the registry
Your wife will likely take the lead on the registry, and that’s great.
But do not fully check out. You are going to want to care.
Pick a few items you have a preference on since you will be using them too. Here are a few I found incredibly useful, but do your own research:
Take a birthing class
I had never thought about the birthing process or my role in it before taking this class. It ended up being one of the best things I did before our baby was born.
You show up at the hospital with other expectant couples and walk through what to expect. I thought it might be boring. It was not.
Here is what I learned that made a big difference:
Indicators that it is time to go to the hospital
Where to park and where to check in
What to expect during labor
How to support your wife in real, practical ways
What is normal and what is not
More than anything, it gives you confidence for when it is time.
You will not remember everything, but you will feel far less overwhelmed.
Take a babymoon
Before the baby arrives, take intentional time away together. This is your last trip where it is just the two of you and you do not have to arrange childcare.
You can go anywhere, but as you get closer, a direct flight becomes more valuable.
For us, the goal was not to do something extravagant. It was the opposite:
Slow down
Enjoy each other’s company
Acknowledge that your relationship is about to change
Do things that bring you life
We went to Arizona, spent time by the pool, and ate great food. If you want to go big, go for it. The goal is to do something that fills you up.
Celebrate the transition with your friends
It is an overused joke, but guys are not always great at talking about what’s “really” going on or celebrating meaningful moments. We know how to do bachelor parties, but after that guys don’t have a typical event to celebrate another guy.
My encouragement is to do something intentional with your friends - even if you have to initiate it.
You do not have to call it a shower, but call it something that signals this is not just a normal hangout. This is a moment to celebrate someone becoming a dad. I’ve been calling it a daddymoon but you can call it anything you want.
For me, my best friends from high school and I played golf in the morning, then went to a house to swim, grill burgers, and watch the Red River Shootout. Everyone brought a pack of diapers for me to take home. There were some decorations. It was simple, a lot of fun, and a day I will never forget.
You are stepping into a new role. It is worth pausing to recognize it with people who have been part of your life.
Open a life insurance policy and read a book
This might sound funny, but I remember doing everything above and still feeling like I needed to do more. I told this to a friend and he gave me great advice.
“If you feel that way, buy a parenting book and open a 30-year term life insurance policy.”
I did both. It gave me peace knowing I was taking care of what I could control.
You will never feel fully ready. That is normal.
But if you use this time intentionally, you will walk into that delivery room with confidence, clarity, and a sense that you did what you could to prepare.
And that matters far more than getting everything perfect.
Dadvice Weekly is Kyle and Skyler—two friends in their thirties, living in Colorado, settling into fatherhood and trying to stay sane. Every Tuesday we share what’s working in our homes: gear we use, routines we’ve tested, ideas we’re trying. It could be a recipe, a product that solved a problem, or just what we’re thinking about as dads.
If you have a tip, tried something we mentioned, or just want to say hi, reply to this email or message us on Substack. We read everything, and we’re always looking for what works. Glad you’re here.
Have you ever thought about writing a book? These posts would make fantastic content.